Bagel jokes and puns: Bagels, those delightful round wonders of the baking world, have a special place in many people’s hearts (and stomachs). Whether you prefer them plain, sesame, or everything bagels, one thing’s for sure: bagels lend themselves perfectly to a smorgasbord of puns.
So, prepare yourself for a pun-filled journey as we explore the doughy depths of bagel humor! A Hole Lot of Fun! So, grab your cream cheese and get ready to chuckle your way through this doughy adventure!
30 Funny and Best Bagel Puns
1. Why did the bagel go to school? Because it wanted to be a little breader!
2. What does a bagel say when it gets locked out? “Let me in, I’m not just some lox!”
3. Why don’t bagels ever get lonely? Because they always have a hole bunch of friends!
4. How do you know if a bagel is a good listener? It always gives you its undivided attention!
5. Why did the bagel break up with the cream cheese? It was getting tired of being spread too thin!
6. What’s a bagel’s favorite dance move? The twist and dough!
7. Why did the bagel join a band? Because it wanted to be a roll star!
8. How does a bagel greet its friends? With a big dough hug!
9. What do you call a bagel that can fly? A plain bagel-eon!
10. Why was the bagel always calm? It knew how to roll with the punches!
11. What’s a bagel’s favorite type of movie? A rom-com-dough!
12. Why don’t bagels ever get lost? Because they always know their way around the bread!
13. What did the bagel say to the bread? “You’re toast!”
14. How do you make a bagel smile? You butter it up!
15. Why did the bagel go to the doctor? It was feeling a little crumby!
Other funny jokes
16. What’s a bagel’s favorite board game? Monop-oh-lee!
17. Why did the bagel go to outer space? It wanted to be a real astro-naught!
18. What did the bagel say to the croissant? “You’re flaky!”
19. Why did the bagel refuse to play football? It was afraid of getting creamed!
20. How does a bagel answer the phone? With a lox of enthusiasm!
21. What’s a bagel’s favorite holiday? Thanks-giving for all the dough!
22. Why did the bagel break up with the toaster? It was tired of getting burned!
23. What’s a bagel’s favorite mode of transportation? The subway, of course!
24. Why was the bagel always invited to parties? It knew how to bring the dough!
25. What do you call a sad bagel? Blue-berry!
26. How does a bagel stay in shape? It exercises its gluten tolerance!
27. Why don’t bagels ever get in fights? They always find a way to rise above it!
28. What did the bagel say to the donut? “You’re jelly!”
29. Why did the bagel go to the beach? To get a little toasty!
30. How does a bagel navigate through traffic? It uses its car-bagel lanes!
Bagel puns one-liners
1. Bagels: Because bread just isn’t round enough.
2. I’m not a bagel expert, but I do know a thing or two about roll-ing in dough.
3. Bagels: The original hole-y food.
4. You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy bagels, and that’s kind of the same thing.
5. Bagels: The perfect excuse to eat carbs in the morning.
6. I’m not saying I’m addicted to bagels, but I do have a pretty strong gluten-tolerance.
7. Bagels: The circle of life (and breakfast).
8. I like big bagels and I cannot lie.
9. Bagels: Making mornings bearable since forever.
10. I’ve got 99 problems, but a bagel ain’t one.
11. In a world full of plain bread, be a sesame bagel.
12. Bagels: The food equivalent of a warm hug.
13. When life gives you lemons, trade them for bagels.
14. I don’t need therapy, I just need a bagel.
15. Bagels: Bringing people together, one schmear at a time.
16. My favorite exercise? Lifting bagels to my mouth.
17. Bagels: The real breakfast of champions.
18. I’m on a seafood diet. I see bagels, and I eat them.
19. Bagels: Proof that good things come in round packages.
20. I’m in a committed relationship—with my bagel toaster.
21. Bagels: Because every meal is better with a hole in the middle.
22. You can’t buy love, but you can buy bagels, and that’s pretty close.
23. Bagels: A delicious way to start your day.
24. I’m not a morning person, but I am a bagel person.
25. Bagels: Making carb-loading socially acceptable since forever.
26. I’m on a first-name basis with my local bagel guy.
27. Bagels: The breakfast that’s always a hole-in-one.
28. I’ll stop eating bagels when they stop being delicious. So, never.
29. Bagels: The ultimate comfort food, no matter how you slice it.
30. I don’t need an excuse to eat a bagel, but I’ll take one anyway.
30 Short Bagel Puns 🥯😄
Sometimes, brevity is the soul of wit – and when it comes to bagel puns, these short and sweet gems deliver a hole lot of humor in just a few words.
1. Bagelicious!
2. Doughn’t be jelly.
3. Simply unbagelievable!
4. Bagels: My daily bread.
5. Bagels: A hole lot better.
6. I love you a hole bunch.
7. Bagels: No loafing around.
8. Everything is better with bagels.
9. Bagels: My jam.
10. Life is short, eat bagels.
11. Don’t worry, be bagel-y.
12. Bagels: The real MVPs.
13. Let’s get this bread—bagel style.
14. Bagels: Always on a roll.
15. Bagels: Making mornings bearable.
16. I’ve got a whole lotta bagelove.
17. Bagels: Can’t be topped.
18. Bagels: The breakfast of champions.
19. Bagels: Always in good taste.
20. Bagels: My daily dose of happiness.
21. Rise and shine with bagels.
22. Bagels: Hole-y grail of breakfast.
23. Bagels: The stuff dreams are made of.
24. Bagels: Your slice of heaven.
25. Bagels: The circle of yum.
26. Bagels: Making mornings great again.
27. Bagels: The cornerstone of breakfast.
28. Bagels: Always in fashion.
29. Bagels: Better than sliced bread.
30. Bagels: A toast to deliciousness!
Bagel Puns Captions, Sayings, and Quotes
Looking for the perfect Instagram caption or a bit of morning motivation? These bagel-inspired quotes and sayings are sure to spread some joy – and maybe a little cream cheese, too.
1. “Bagels: The wheel deal of breakfast.”
2. “Life is short. Eat the bagel.”
3. “You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy bagels, and that’s basically the same thing.”
4. “All you knead is love… and bagels.”
5. “In a world full of muffins, dare to be a bagel.”
6. “Keep calm and bagel on.”
7. “Bagels: The breakfast of champions.”
8. “Find someone who looks at you the way I look at a fresh bagel.”
9. “Bagels: Because no great story ever started with a salad.” – Unknown
10. “I followed my heart, and it led me to bagels.”
11. “I’m just a bagel, standing in front of a toaster, asking it to love me.”
12. “Bagels: Making mornings bearable since forever.” – Unknown
13. “A bagel a day keeps the grumpy away.”
14. “Love is a lot like a bagel: best when it’s warm and fresh.” – Unknown
15. “Bagels: The ultimate comfort food, no matter how you slice it.”
16. “When life gives you lemons, trade them for bagels.”
17. “Rise and shine, it’s bagel time!”
18. “I like big bagels and I cannot lie.”
19. “Bagels: The food equivalent of a warm hug.”
20. “Good bagels come to those who wait.”
21. “Bagels: The unsung heroes of breakfast.”
22. “Bagels: Always the breadwinner.”
23. “You can’t spell ‘bagel’ without ‘bag’.”
24. “Bagels: The circle of life (and breakfast).”
25. “Bagels: Better together.”
26. “Let’s get this bread—bagel style.”
27. “Bagels: The hole-y grail of breakfast.”
28. “Bagels: A slice of heaven in every bite.”
29. “Bagels: The cornerstone of any nutritious breakfast.”
30. “Life is uncertain. Eat the bagel.”
10 Bagel Knock Knock Jokes:
1. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Bagel.
Bagel who?
Bagel over here and let me in!
2. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Dough.
Dough who?
Dough-n’t you want a bagel?
3. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive bagels, especially with cream cheese!
4. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
  Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce have a bagel together!
5. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Al.
Al who?
Al have a bagel, thank you very much!
6. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you glad I brought bagels?
7. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Butter.
Butter who?
Butter open the bagel, quick!
8. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Noah.
Noah who?
Noah better breakfast than a bagel!
9. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Figs.
Figs who?
Figs the bagels are ready!
10. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Atch.
Atch who?
Atch your appetite because here come the bagels!
25 Bagel Puns Questions and Answers
Curious about bagel humor? These witty Q&A pairs will satisfy your appetite for puns while giving you a taste of the delightful wordplay that makes bagels so pun-derful.
1. **Q:** What did the bagel say to the bread?
  **A:** “You’re toast!”
2. **Q:** Why did the bagel go to school?
**A:** Because it wanted to be a little breader!
3. **Q:** What’s a bagel’s favorite mode of transportation?
**A:** The subway, of course!
4. **Q:** Why did the bagel break up with the cream cheese?
**A:** It was getting tired of being spread too thin!
5. **Q:** How does a bagel navigate through traffic?
**A:** It uses its car-bagel lanes!
6. **Q:** Why don’t bagels ever get lonely?
**A:** Because they always have a hole bunch of friends!
7. **Q:** What do you call a bagel that can fly?
**A:** A plain bagel-eon!
8. **Q:** How does a bagel greet its friends?
**A:** With a big dough hug!
9. **Q:** What’s a bagel’s favorite type of movie?
**A:** A rom-com-dough!
10. **Q:** Why was the bagel always calm?
**A:** It knew how to roll with the punches!
11. **Q:** What did the bagel say to the croissant?
**A:** “You’re flaky!”
12. **Q:** How do you make a bagel smile?
**A:** You butter it up!
13. **Q:** Why did the bagel go to outer space?
   **A:** It wanted to be a real astro-naught!
Humorous Q&A jokes
14. **Q:** What’s a bagel’s favorite holiday?
**A:** Thanks-giving for all the dough!
15. **Q:** Why did the bagel refuse to play football?
**A:** It was afraid of getting creamed!
16. **Q:** What did the bagel say to the donut?
**A:** “You’re jelly!”
17. **Q:** Why did the bagel break up with the toaster?
**A:** It was tired of getting burned!
18. **Q:** What do you call a sad bagel?
**A:** Blue-berry!
19. **Q:** How does a bagel stay in shape?
**A:** It exercises its gluten tolerance!
20. **Q:** Why don’t bagels ever get in fights?
**A:** They always find a way to rise above it!
21. **Q:** What did the bagel say to the bread?
**A:** “You’re toast!”
22. **Q:** Why did the bagel go to school?
**A:** Because it wanted to be a little breader!
23. **Q:** What’s a bagel’s favorite mode of transportation?
**A:** The subway, of course!
24. **Q:** Why did the bagel break up with the cream cheese?
   **A:** It was getting tired of being spread too thin!
25. **Q:** How does a bagel navigate through traffic?
**A:** It uses its car-bagel lanes!
Conclusion: Let’s Spread Some Bagel Joy!
There you have it, folks – a dough-lightful assortment of bagel puns to brighten your day and tickle your funny bone. Whether you’re a seasoned pun aficionado or just dipping your toes into the world of wordplay, I hope these bagel puns brought a smile to your face and maybe even inspired you to whip up a batch of your own.
Now it’s your turn! Share your favorite bagel puns in the comments below and let’s keep the laughter rolling. After all, there’s no such thing as too many bagel puns!